"People often say that motivation doesn't last.
Well, neither does bathing--
that's why we recommend it daily" -- Zig Ziglar
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Sunday, June 11, 2006
today's episode was brought to you by the letters T and L, and by the number 23...
ah birthdays...they take forever when we're younger. i swear i only aged once every two years until i turned 10. my birthdays have started to pick up their pace - not a sprinter's stride, more like a powerwalk. the last few have found me in places very different from the preceding year of my life. and everytime i'm like, "man! i could have never guessed i would be here a year ago." take that statement for better or for worse. it feels true to say that change has been the most constant thing (i'll put my nickel in the cliche jar after i'm done). i think birthdays are nice, really, and they ought to be celebrated because, well, if for no other reason we've managed to operate on a huge spinning dome for an entire year without flying off. so, i salute you birthday! i can truly say the day i met you i knew i would never be the same...
what is it about themes? i'm not going to attribute everything to my love of language and literature, so my inkling to give my birthday a theme is not (just) so that this year in my life will already have a chapter title for the book, but because the birthdays leading up to chronological adulthood have these bells and whistles about them - at 1 year you're actually a number; at 2 years you've learned to be a terror (funny, that one of the first descriptors we give to humans - "terrible" then they grow and become...i digress); at 10 years you are a two digit number, and every subsequent year from there to 13 you're a year closer to being a teenager; at 13 you have full permission to act outside of your mind and call it"growing up" or "puberty" or whatever other excuse we could come up with for acting a damn fool and being mad at our parents all the time; at 16 you're sweet (i'm not even going to speak on that); at 18 you're "legal" - or at least you can buy cigarettes; at 21 you are "all the way legal", for you can purchase your own liquid vices (rather than asking an older friend or something)...
then what? there's this thing i've only just been informed of called a "quarter life crisis." i think it occurs around 25 years. i don't know what it's all about; all i know is that there's assessing and reflection and resolutions and the like. similar to the midlife one, but without the perks. we have all of the neuroses without the benefit of being established enough to do something wild (because wild usually means expensive in one way or another). but that sounds like my every other weekend. then there's midlife - 35 years, where we endure major life changes (sometimes whether we want to or not). after that, what happens? according to thumb and his general rule, as women we just go on about our business and wait for menopause. that shit's for the birds. every birthday is valid because we have lived to see it. so, maybe that's why this notion of theme has come because we all deserve to be excited (whether it's to ourselves or outwardly is of no consequence)...
as i am new to 23, i think to myself, "what awesome attributes are connected to this #?" of course, michael jordan is the first in my mind. a mighty strong example too. what else? in 1923, the Cotton Club opened in Harlem and Jean Toomer published his seminal text CANE. these are all exceptional references, and therefore i am inspired to make my 23rd year "above the rim." to exceed not only succeed in my endeavors...
no, i didn't know all those things off the cuff, but i must admit the research part was fun. yeah, so maybe this is relevant or maybe just a way to pass the time. it's about whatever gets your mojo working, right? so what's your year-in-theme? any other takers for 23? i'm curious...
lov[e, ing] al[l]ways--
what is it about themes? i'm not going to attribute everything to my love of language and literature, so my inkling to give my birthday a theme is not (just) so that this year in my life will already have a chapter title for the book, but because the birthdays leading up to chronological adulthood have these bells and whistles about them - at 1 year you're actually a number; at 2 years you've learned to be a terror (funny, that one of the first descriptors we give to humans - "terrible" then they grow and become...i digress); at 10 years you are a two digit number, and every subsequent year from there to 13 you're a year closer to being a teenager; at 13 you have full permission to act outside of your mind and call it"growing up" or "puberty" or whatever other excuse we could come up with for acting a damn fool and being mad at our parents all the time; at 16 you're sweet (i'm not even going to speak on that); at 18 you're "legal" - or at least you can buy cigarettes; at 21 you are "all the way legal", for you can purchase your own liquid vices (rather than asking an older friend or something)...
then what? there's this thing i've only just been informed of called a "quarter life crisis." i think it occurs around 25 years. i don't know what it's all about; all i know is that there's assessing and reflection and resolutions and the like. similar to the midlife one, but without the perks. we have all of the neuroses without the benefit of being established enough to do something wild (because wild usually means expensive in one way or another). but that sounds like my every other weekend. then there's midlife - 35 years, where we endure major life changes (sometimes whether we want to or not). after that, what happens? according to thumb and his general rule, as women we just go on about our business and wait for menopause. that shit's for the birds. every birthday is valid because we have lived to see it. so, maybe that's why this notion of theme has come because we all deserve to be excited (whether it's to ourselves or outwardly is of no consequence)...
as i am new to 23, i think to myself, "what awesome attributes are connected to this #?" of course, michael jordan is the first in my mind. a mighty strong example too. what else? in 1923, the Cotton Club opened in Harlem and Jean Toomer published his seminal text CANE. these are all exceptional references, and therefore i am inspired to make my 23rd year "above the rim." to exceed not only succeed in my endeavors...
no, i didn't know all those things off the cuff, but i must admit the research part was fun. yeah, so maybe this is relevant or maybe just a way to pass the time. it's about whatever gets your mojo working, right? so what's your year-in-theme? any other takers for 23? i'm curious...
lov[e, ing] al[l]ways--
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
kick... push... coast.
yeah, it's been a minute. so don't think, "i know this heifer hasn't been away all this time and the best she can come back with is lupe fiasco's ode to skaters? she better had been on a mountain meditating - at least a grassy knoll or something!" well, the truth is i have been busy, but i definitely can't say exactly what's been occuring. it's been a blend of negotiating co-habitation; increased responsibility in the workplace; seizing opportunities for creative freelance work; reentering (slowly, softly) the spokenword arena; enjoying the heat i waited all winter for; planning trips i can't wait to take; improving myself. honestly, i include that last one in haste as it has only been a late addition to the list. not because there aren't enough things to improve, but because i still put myself last in many cases. the good thing about that? you know the adage, "i shall be first" and all. the bad thing? i'm usually too damn tired by the time i get around to me to do what i need/want to do. i must make a conscious effort to change this. now granted, fiasco's song ( i refuse to call him lupe) has nothing to do with my life on the personal tip aside from the fact that i too can recall 'looking for a place to be', but his hook - this refrain - these 3 words have such mantra potential. allow me to ghetto philisophize for a minute...
KICK: we all know that 'even the longest journey begins with a single step' (or something like that). well, if one had to take that step - say - in the mud, going uphill, in church shoes, while it's raining... well, that's more than a simple step. and that's the way the beginning of any worthwhile endeavor is - you have to fight for it. you have to fight hard. you have to give it everything. you have to kick...
PUSH: if you persevere - just a little bit, after a while it gets easier. there's still effort involved, but you're familiar with the process at least- whatever it may be - and familiarity takes the edge off most things. sure, you haven't reached your goal yet, but maybe you can see it. or maybe you can't see it, but you know it's there and you feel so good about the work you're putting in that the means justify themselves (that is essential for me). you really appreciate the journey - struggle and progress at the same time. just push...
COAST: this is the space i yearn for. not laziness, but when i have made good practices in my life such persistent habits that they are second nature - even easy, and a pleasure. and so i repeat them, as that which we enjoy we tend to do often. it's a win-win because we do what is pleasurable, and that which is pleasurable is good for us - a life of fun because when you enjoy the things you do it isn't work, right? inherent in this aspect is awareness and gratitude too. how can everything be a pleasure? even the seemingly menial, everyday tasks? perspective is key. consider those who cannot even do what you do (this is not at all supporting a competitive culture that says the only way to feel good about yourself is to find someone who's worse off). also consider how far you have come, and try to always (as a wise friend told me) be present. when we give our full attention to something, we are more fully stimulated by it, and thereby more thoroughly satisfied. living this existance is a joy. so, coast...
so this mantra is pretty premature still. maybe i'll test it out - see how/ if it works. i'm sure there are more profound and founded logic. i know "kick, push, coast" might not sound so good as a chant. but if i can conceptualize and realize the struggle, the thriving and the arrival all in one breath, well then this woman's got her best years ahead of her.
kicking,
teresa
KICK: we all know that 'even the longest journey begins with a single step' (or something like that). well, if one had to take that step - say - in the mud, going uphill, in church shoes, while it's raining... well, that's more than a simple step. and that's the way the beginning of any worthwhile endeavor is - you have to fight for it. you have to fight hard. you have to give it everything. you have to kick...
PUSH: if you persevere - just a little bit, after a while it gets easier. there's still effort involved, but you're familiar with the process at least- whatever it may be - and familiarity takes the edge off most things. sure, you haven't reached your goal yet, but maybe you can see it. or maybe you can't see it, but you know it's there and you feel so good about the work you're putting in that the means justify themselves (that is essential for me). you really appreciate the journey - struggle and progress at the same time. just push...
COAST: this is the space i yearn for. not laziness, but when i have made good practices in my life such persistent habits that they are second nature - even easy, and a pleasure. and so i repeat them, as that which we enjoy we tend to do often. it's a win-win because we do what is pleasurable, and that which is pleasurable is good for us - a life of fun because when you enjoy the things you do it isn't work, right? inherent in this aspect is awareness and gratitude too. how can everything be a pleasure? even the seemingly menial, everyday tasks? perspective is key. consider those who cannot even do what you do (this is not at all supporting a competitive culture that says the only way to feel good about yourself is to find someone who's worse off). also consider how far you have come, and try to always (as a wise friend told me) be present. when we give our full attention to something, we are more fully stimulated by it, and thereby more thoroughly satisfied. living this existance is a joy. so, coast...
so this mantra is pretty premature still. maybe i'll test it out - see how/ if it works. i'm sure there are more profound and founded logic. i know "kick, push, coast" might not sound so good as a chant. but if i can conceptualize and realize the struggle, the thriving and the arrival all in one breath, well then this woman's got her best years ahead of her.
kicking,
teresa
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