Tuesday, November 20, 2007

party like a rockstar…vampire…rockstar…whatever (ANTM)

I’m not going to pretend to remember much details from the other week, but here’s what I do recall:

Lisa – stepped it up
Heather – rocked it out
Saleisha – turned it on
Bianca – puckered it up
Ambreal – had a twitch
Chantal – had a ‘tude
Sarah – wasn’t comfortable

If you saw the episode, this summation makes sense to you (perhaps), but if you did not (which would be the reason for reading this) the above makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE. So let me ‘splain…

The lesson of the week was in sexiness, taught by Tyra herself. The girls practiced 3 “distinct” techniques: the sexy runway walk, the seductive crawl and the wall slide (really, they slid down the wall and came back up). These were the creative names that Tyra gave to said techniques – that writers’ strike is more apparent than ever! Perhaps there was a little method to this madness, but I think Tyra just wanted an excuse to play out her FAME scenario.

The girls did not have a traditional photo shoot; they were in an Enrique Iglesia video. The concept was an underground vampire nightclub (stop me if you’ve heard this one before…). There was much green background and tinting; also there was lots of silver studded embellishments, black patent leather and mesh-y netted things.

Lisa was chosen as the principal girl in the video, which is good because I am thoroughly convinced that she was on her way out the door. Heather’s pale skin, dark hair and deep gaze was perfect for this video; she did a bang up job, but also, in the tradition of rock stars, she suffered exhaustion on the set and nearly passed out. She later said that she hadn’t eaten since breakfast. I appreciate her wanting to be a trooper and all, but damn girl! Eat a sandwich! Saleisha was in a group setting with Bianca and Sarah where she definitely stood out. She gave wonderful eyes, and even though she didn’t do much she kept it interesting. Her whispering something to Sarah (who sat beside her) was good improv. Sarah, while giving great eyes, was not very comfortable in her super revealing ensemble; though it wasn’t apparent to me during the shooting, she did mention it during the outtakes. Bianca, Bianca, Bianca – we all know your lips are there. No need to pucker them incessantly and bring even more attention. I thought that the strong/sexy/attitude that the video called for was right up her alley, but Bianca was trying way too hard. Her look was fierce, but she modeled like an amateur. Chantal was annoyed that she wasn’t chosen as the principle, so she didn’t seem to try very hard. Ambreal, on the other hand, had to prove that she deserved to be there, so she danced her little heart out. Unfortunately, in the final edited video they showed at panel, she had too little burlesque and too much bop.

At panel, the judges reviewed stills from the video shoot. They were ga-ga over Lisa (especially that leg action), enamored with Heather and impressed with Saleisha. Nigel brought Sarah’s weight into the discussion again, but the panel thought that Sarah was not comfortable enough in her own skin. She was eliminated.

What do I think? She wasn’t big enough for plus size and not small enough for regular runway. So, they copped out; they claimed the big girl/ little self esteem thing and let Sarah go because they couldn’t figure out how to market her. Sarah was really broken up about it (I don’t think anybody’s ever cried that hard!), and I felt for her.

*wow, i remembered more than i thought! how do you like that?

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