happy [re]new year...no, really happy...

let me begin this post, and this year in genuine thanks for love and life and friends and family and all components of this here existence. "funny thing about life. it means forever and that's a mighty long time" - but enough of my prince tanget. (deep breath). my time in jersey was well spent, and i needed it more than i knew. the more i reflect, i'll probably find new things i learned; even my frustrations were appropriately placed. my first night was spent having the ill catch-up dinner with high school homies. man i love those sisters. truth be told, i couldn't help but think of L when i'm sending emails and making plans before i hit the ground, and the fact that they were able to come together on such short notice made me feel really good. man! we were loud and funny and happy and so drunk off of the presence of one another - a terrific time!... my family is doing well and they seem to grow (all of them, in one way or another) every time i see them. the regular spats still occur, but there seems to be a level of cooperation and consideration that i didn't see before. my mom was telling me how M&M just sit up late nights talking to each now, finishing each other's sentences. she beams to tell me this, and we both smile because they used to fight so much. we knew the day would come when that would be over, but we didn't know when it would come - thank God it has arrived!... recorded in a studio for the first time, and except for the poor time managemnt and varying degrees of unprofessionalism, it was real cool. the producer has talent (shout out Flan!) and my homeboy, impetus behind the project, has quite a breadth of knowledge when it comes to music (shout out DS!). the result is better tracks... new year's was so low key and yet so over the top. catharsis, raw emotion, frustration, tears, intentions, "look at me"; ye, though we walked through the valley ---- honesty, compromise, resolution, embrace, tears, love; truly we were made as garments for one another. if it were only up to us and our pitiful selfishness and foolish pride, there's no telling of the outcome, but praise to the Best of All Planners. i didn't declare any official resolutions, but i guess that counts as a pretty big one... i almost felt as if my new year began again when i returned to kansas city last night. i was greeted by a cold apartment and an unexpected bill, but before i concocted all kinds of clever curses it occurred to me - there are people outside in this cold and i have the means to pay this bill. perspective, teresa. perspective...